In the interest of protecting the privacy of those involved in these shenanigans, I shall replace the names of the characters with pseudonyms. Let us call our protagonists Randolph, the gracious host; Earl, the charming southerner; Douglas, the diligent scholar; and Maxwell, the burly athlete.

Once upon an autumn evening at Georgia Tech, the illustrious Randolph had invited his dear comrades to join him in revelry at his fraternity house. Assembled in his cramped quarters, with ceilings so low they threatened to touch the heads of the tallest among them, were Earl, hailing from Auburn, and Douglas, a notorious binge drinker from UGA, renowned for his ability to keep up with the best of them. The three friends, together with Cedric, Randolph’s affable roommate, were partaking in their customary libations, the laughter and camaraderie echoing through the small space.

Arriving tardy to the festivities was Maxwell, a hulking 300-pound lineman from Stanford, who had gained weight solely for the sake of his athletic pursuits. Seeking to catch up to his already well-lubricated companions, he downed a shaker cup brimming with Southern Comfort and lime juice, his inexperience with such indulgences evident in his unsteady hands.

The boisterous group, unsatisfied with their confined surroundings, ventured out into the night, aiming to join another gathering hosted by a group of female acquaintances at Georgia State. En route, they encountered officers of the law, their suspicions aroused by the jovial band. Cleverly, the friends managed to persuade the officers of their innocence, promising to cause no further disturbance.

As the night unfolded, the party at Georgia State, hosted by Tiffany, proved to be a dull affair. Disappointed, Randolph and Douglas departed, leaving behind Maxwell, who had by this point become thoroughly inebriated, and Earl, now burdened with the responsibility of caring for his intoxicated companion. Randolph and Douglas, seeking further amusement, accompanied an acquaintance named Percival to another gathering at Georgia Tech, where they partook in the smoking of marijuana and attempted to engage in freestyle rapping, much to the chagrin of their host, Sebastian.

Back at Georgia State, chaos ensued as Maxwell, having roused himself from his stupor, vomited into the backpack of Camille, who was visiting Tiffany, before stumbling out of the apartment. Earl, unable to muster much concern, casually relayed the events to Randolph, Douglas, and Percival upon their return.

The group split up to search for Maxwell, eventually spotting him from a distance, rampaging through the halls like a monstrous creature from legend. After a lengthy search, they reunited with Maxwell, who was now being held by the same officers from earlier. Douglas, too intoxicated to maintain his composure, addressed the female officer as “sir” and slurred the word “officer” into “ociffer,” while Randolph remained silent. Fortunately, Percival’s silver tongue and experience with such situations allowed them to avoid any legal consequences.

Upon returning to the Georgia Tech fraternity house, the friends marveled at Maxwell’s recounting of his encounter with the officers, having cleverly deceived them with a fake phone number and an incomplete social security number.

And so, the escapades of these young men, united by friendship and a penchant for mischief, continued well into the night, their laughter and revelry echoing through the hallowed halls of the fraternity house.